As an admin for a popular Final Fantasy XI website, I'm used to taking abuse from random people who I don't know. Nuking inappropriate posts and banning people who advertise sites violating my site's terms of agreement doesn't happen often, but I usually make mincemeat out of them fairly quick. (An explanation of this link can be found with the rest of the story.)

In this case, it took me a mere seven minutes to nuke the guy's post and ban him. The thread goes like this:

222 (banned)

« Last Edit: Jul 19th, 2005, 11:41pm by TheFunch »

Earendur
LOL....

Wurg
I Realy do dread to think what could have made TheFunch ban him in one go.

Probably talking about FFXI Flaws, or trying to sell gil

Debi
why worry about it?? He takes care of us so we don't get unwanted spam or advertising. <3 you Funch.

TheFunch (me)
on Jul 21st, 2005, 11:41am, Wurg wrote:
I Realy do dread to think what could have made TheFunch ban him in one go.

on Jul 21st, 2005, 12:21pm, Debi wrote:
why worry about it?? He takes care of us so we don't get unwanted spam or advertising. <3 you Funch.

Lonewolf
He sacrifices his free FFXI time just to help us.... We do appreciate that, you know, Funch.

Thanatos
awwwww
I wanted to see what he typed?
Damn i always miss out on those banned ppls posts. lol

Debi
I think we all did, Than. Funch is like Quick Draw McGraw. Quick on the trigger.

--------------------------------
(Aside: Such a nice crowd of people on the Lobby! I love my job!)

However, I am not a moderator or admin on Allakhazam, which, unfortunately, tends to be flamefest central. Naturally, I expect some flames when I post this as the response to a perfectly legitimate question:

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The only way I have been able to get [Final Fantasy XI] to work is by encapsulating [it] in a program like Sockscap or Proxycap and run a Java program (google for tunnel.jar) on a server outside the network. In my case, however, the university network is either so slow or they are using packet shaping that when I can log in, the connection usually dies (I have been able to get in from behind other firewalls, so I know that this process does work).
----

and the reply I get back prompts me to have to post this response:

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BennytheOrcs wrote: "yeah thats interesting. Surely theres a way you can pay for that sort of thing. I mean money is no issue for me if it means playing FFXI."

What's there to pay for? If there isn't enough bandwidth on a university network, there isn't enough bandwidth. If they're packet shaping, they're not going to adjust the settings so that it doesn't packet shape one person's packets.

BennytheOrcs wrote: "Im still waiting on a response from Hopster about compatibility with FFXI."

Why, when I just told you how you can play FFXI? Or are you just too lazy to go Google the darn thing like I said?

The first frickin link (i.e. NOT THAT HARD TO FIND)
http://www.rpgexpert.com/3538.html

Follow the directions.

Every program out there like Hopster (including HTTP-Tunnel) will not work because they usually don't support UDP, which is why I said "The only way I have been able to get it to work is by encapsulating FFXI...and run a Java program...tunnel.jar".
----

Now I don't have his responses because they've been effectively nuked by the mods, but they pale in comparison to the private messages that I found today sitting in my box at Alla, so bad that I almost posted a note to the mods (until I found out that he had already been banned!):

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Subject: die
From: BennytheOrcs
To: TheFunch
Sent: Sep 24, 2005 @ 11:06 PM ET

your a @#%^ing prick. die
----
Subject: die pt 2
From: BennytheOrcs
To: TheFunch
Sent: Sep 24, 2005 @ 11:17 PM ET

u think im some kinda 2 year old u sad nerd. i'd stab ur face
----

(For full disclosure, the two posts by me that I quoted further up were the only posts I made in the entire thread. I had no correspondence with this BennytheOrcs, either through a forum thread or via PMs. Other people, however, flamed BennytheOrcs for flaming me, which probably prompted the PMs.)

Damn. IANAP (I am not a psychologist) but I think some anger management sessions are in order. Maybe I should've just stayed at the Lobby and held to my word that I'd never post at Allakhazam again.

Oh, and BennytheOrcs? If you decide to comment on my blog, I swear by your choice of deity that I will nuke it to hell, the next galaxy, and back if it's the kind of #$%@ you PM'd me. Complaining is one thing; threatening to kill me is another.

Posted by Robert J. Funches at 10:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

My beautiful dark-blue glass fountain pen works wonderfully! It writes very well. I've replaced the boring old text "by Robert J. Funches" with a handwritten banner, written with the pen that now serves as a divider between blog entries.

Posted by Robert J. Funches at 10:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I really hate headaches. Especially migraines. I have medicine -- Midrin -- that's strong enough to physically prevent me from getting out of bed.

The migraine I had yesterday afternoon made taking that medication useless. To all the people who showed up at the MUN at VCU meeting, I apologize, but there was no way I would've been able to make it to the other side of campus; heck, I doubt I could've made it even if I were living on Monroe Park, a short walk away.

$#@%*^& headaches.

Posted by Robert J. Funches at 06:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Two of my friends were over at my house for New Year's two years ago. One of them decided to play darts using a roman candle and a pizza box. Needless to say, this should not be attempted by anyone, anywhere, anytime; for the reason, watch.

http://www.robertjfunches.com/blog/romancandledarts.wmv (2.3 MB)

Posted by Robert J. Funches at 09:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

It's been some time since my blog has been up and working. The simple explanation? Not enough time (or willpower) to get it working in its past state. The hard drive on the old Funches Media server finally kicked the bucket, and my last backup was old, to say the least. It was too much of a hassle to get the old blog back up and working, so after I had some time, I just set up a new blog.

So what's happened to the Funch since the old blog? Well, he's graduated from high school, settled down at Virginia Commonwealth University as a business IT/IS major, made a tidy profit running the Vana'diel Lobby Gift Shop, and (at least, for now -- this is a continuing saga, I assure you) lost access to Final Fantasy XI except via dial-up thanks to the wonderful IT folks at VCU and their ever-so-faithful firewall and network.

I ended up at VCU as a result of the infinite wisdom of the admission folks at Christopher Newport and Old Dominion, so in a last-minute application I was accepted to the school where my brother graduated from (my other choices were Elizabeth City State in N.C. -- they called me two days before graduation to let me know I was accepted -- and Morgan State University in Balitimore, M.D. - presumably, I got in there, but my application was held up because I did not send back paperwork saying that I was not a felon).

Whenever I get the photo gallery back up, you'll also find photos from my trip to both Okinawa and Aichi, Japan, over the summer. I still plan on publishing a photo book of the Heiwadori market in Okinawa at some point; I have more than enough pictures to put one together now.

The title of my blog identifies me as a writer, so you're probably wondering where my other writings are. I've just recently started editing on the first draft of the Fiona novel, now tentatively titled "Traversing the Worlds." The draft weighs in at over 91,000 words and 350 pages; where it ends up is anyone's guess. In addition, I've written a few short stories which I'm trying to place, including "Apartments on 24th" (my readers will remember this from the old blog) as well as "Murderer in a Past Life," which my girlfriend says is "creepy" as hell.

Here at VCU I'm now the Secretary General/President of the Model United Nations Club, since, if nothing more, it'll help my slim chances of getting a transfer into Carnegie Mellon University for the fall 2006 semester. It's a lot of hard work and money -- I had to cough up $18 for a gavel, and the university won't reimburse me for it because we haven't and can't submit a budget for at least three months -- but I think it's worth it, and besides, I get to run a conference.

Unlike the old blog, this one will see a lot more updates, since I have a lot more free time than I used to. Other than that, everything'll be pretty much the same.

Posted by Robert J. Funches at 09:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)